A Norwegian vaulter named Noel
Was lined up to sign for the dole
They asked him "Profession?"
And he said: "Confession -
I'm banned for mis-handling my pole!"

I signed up for Ghaza Strip cricket
but laughed as I strode to the wicket
the bats were hand-made
the ball a grenade
the bowler a mortar - "Nope - Stick it!"

In anguish I tried to play hockey
the other team played it so cocky!
I felt rather ill
the score nineteen - nil
(our goalie was really a jockey)

If fishing is labelled a sport
then why is there nothing gets caught?
At my local creek
I fished all last week
and lost thirty lures...What a Rort!

In fencing you parry and thrust
and burying swords is a must
while wielding your dart
you aim for the heart
My Gooodness! It's rather like lust!

An Irish chap ran about gaily
in search of the "Tossing Shillalagh"
he cried: "Is it so?
that I can't have a throw?
back home we all toss our sticks daily!"

A golfer lay on the green, dead
Took seventeen putts - so they said
as his last golf club broke
he suffered a stroke
he should have played baseball instead!