I bought a
plasma TV set - as high as it was wide,
to keep up
with the Joneses, I suppose,
disappointment really, coz no matter how I tried
it tuned in
to the same old crappy shows!
four-wheel drive pursuit car is an engineering feat,
it broke the
record: Brooklyn to Tibet,
there on my driveway, not allowed out on the street,
afford insurance for it yet!
mower's turbo-charged Ferrari-born and bred,
it's nice to
sit on top of so much brawn,
I wear a
racing helmet and the mower's even red -
I wish I
hadn't concreted the lawn...
titanium laptop set me back a lot of dough,
weight is levied on your fare,
a shame I
never fly at all - nowhere for me to go,
I'm getting great at Solitaire!
ring tone plays the latest cyber-special song,
hip-hop frog who croaks and sings,
I got it on
a contract that is four or five years long,
is - it never bloody rings!
kitchen's full of gadgets - like some science lab from Hell,
I buy a
great new doodad every day,
if ever I
should cook a meal, I know I'll do it well,
for now, I
only dine on take-away!
sold me real estate, so I could have a "break"
where all the city troubles dim,
I visited my
block - smack in the middle of a lake!
- if I had ever learned to swim!
feeling ill, I may have caught the latest bug,
I took some
pills the doctor said were "chic"
here on my futon on my new designer rug,
and think of
stuff that I can buy next week!
more of my
FUNNY POEMS here