to Claudius and said: "This isn't right!
It cost us
twenty ducats each to see this Tuscan fight,
that he would slay a dozen Christians - maybe more,
but now he's
lost his weapon and his future's looking poor!"
gladiator's strength lies in his choice of killing tool,
man stood there weaponless, a handsome, helpless fool,
sped throughout the Coliseum, cheering loud,
took his toga off and waved it at the crowd!
beard," said Titus, "such a thing I've never seen!"
from Phobos turned a sickly shade of green,
thousand Roman women watched, and pledged their heart,
that Hunkus got his name from one huge body part!
this huge weapon, swung it like a deadly mace,
Christians fell to ground, they sent more in their place,
a brave one
tried to fight but Hunkus donged him on the head,
devastating minutes, and they all were lying dead.
cheered quite madly, but their husbands' heads were bowed,
seen a fight by one so physically endowed,
no need for
sword or trident, Hunkus simply stood his ground,
out all his enemies by spinning round and round!
yelled out: "Cheat!" and all the Roman men agreed,
the women smiling, this was what they didn't need,
were quite demanding, and the men folk rather small,
would be trouble, so he had to take a fall.
surrounded him, the crowd was hushed and still,
the men all
nodded knowingly, and waited for the kill,
looked into the stands, then turned and showed his bum -
pandemonium broke out as Caesar raised his thumb!
that Hunkus never made it into history's fame,
a search of
Roman fighting men will not reveal his name,
legionnaire dispatched him - not so dead as much as quit,
his one Achilles heel: a circumcision kit!
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