One day, out
in the western woods, a bear
what he always loved to do,
the morning tracking down a hare,
were looking good for rabbit stew!
like a pony down the trail,
in between them getting less,
ahead he heard a tearful wail -
and sniffed the sweet smell of success!
take him long to find the hare,
over something on the track,
said: "Well, well, well, what have we there?
be mine - you'd better give it back!"
The hare was
clutching something in his paws,
covered with some kind of hide,
the bear sat
down and grabbed it with his claws
eh? Well, let's see what's inside!"
the cork, a giant puff of smoke
the bottle with a whooshing sound,
into a genie, and he spoke:
that bloody bottle has been found!
a thousand years in there, you know,
that you two have set me free,
to show my
gratitude, before I go,
to each of you the Wishes Three!"
declared the bear, "that in these woods
would be a female, now, today,
and only me
would have the manly goods,
I'll have a
brand-new girlfriend every day!"
the genie cried, "they're now all girls!"
And then he
asked the hare: "The same for you -
Or would you
like some rubies, gold or pearls?
forget you have another two!"
looked lost in thought and then he said:
"I reckon I
can safely answer that -
some good protection for my head:
brand-new motorcycle hat!"
laughed at the helmet straight away,
he said: "I
have a great idea - and how!
bear across the USA
a female -
that should keep me busy now!"
The genie turned back to the hare,
the second wish that you would like?"
said: "Something that goes any where,
I want a
fuelled-up, brand-new motorbike!"
A puff of
smoke, and there a Honda stood,
red, electric start, the best!
jumped on and nodded: "This is good!"
said: "What the hell, I'll take the rest!
wish," said the bear, "the planet, too!
world all bears will turn to 'She'
My God, can
you imagine how they'll queue
their turn with handsome, rugged ME?"
waved his hand and cried "It's done!
land no male bears - how absurd!
In all the
world you are the only one!"
back to the hare, "Please wish your third!"
roared to life so easily,
said to the genie: "Make my day!"
the genie answered, "What'll it be?"
"I wish that
he is now forever gay!"
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FUNNY POEMS here