I begged my chooks for eggs and got a dozen

then sold them at the swap meet for a buck

which paid in full my bullet-headed cousin

who bought some gas and put it in his truck.

We drove out to the desert on the blacktop

a cactus pointed out the way to hell

as summer set the mountains bled a backdrop

I tried to help him scale them but he fell.

Alone above the world I found religion

and went into a coma for a year

a dream convinced me I had been a pigeon

and from now on I'll only worship beer.

As time stood still I heard the voice of reason

which turned out to be just a circus clown

our argument was somewhat out of season

he went insane - I had to put him down.

Back home it seemed that nothing really mattered

I didn't give a fig for time or space

my faith in retail profit margins shattered

I pulled the plug and drowned the human race.