I fished on Monday night and never caught one,

the bait shop blamed the moonlight – far too bright,

I’d promised fish for dinner so I bought one,

and vowed to try again tomorrow night.

On Tuesday night a chilling wind was biting.

I caught none and I should have stayed in bed,

the bait shop blamed the high tide I was fighting,

the next night would be better, so they said.

On Wednesday night I tried my hand at spinning,

a dozen lures at thirteen bucks a pop,

the score was seven – nil, the fish were winning,

I’d tied the knots all wrong, so said the shop.

On Thursday night the weather turned to freezing,

I tried down near the power station drain,

I never got a bite and started sneezing,

the bait shop said the fish don’t like the rain.

I spent all Friday night locked up in prison,

they let me go – no evidence was found,

but I’ll confess to anyone who’ll listen:

I burned that stinking bait shop to the ground!

more of my FUNNY POEMS here