into the bank and asked the teller for a loan,
that he’d check his boss and see,
into the office, and I heard an awful moan,
have seen my credit history!
outside, my car was gone and I was rather narked,
rate in the city is a pest,
but then I
saw the note where I had previously parked:
Goodbye. Your car is re-possessed!”
I caught the
bus, was late to work, the boss was looking rough,
I guess the
pressure made him very tired,
he said I’d
been on borrowed time, but now I’d had enough,
somebody else, cause I was fired!
down to the bar and ordered vintage whisky mash,
a cool drink
in my hand and I relaxed,
grabbed my glass and she insisted I pay cash,
my credit card was maxxed!
I sat down
in the diner, ordered steak and eggs to go,
and a sandwich on a plate,
they informed me that they had to see my dough,
have my dinner on the slate!
home past the library, received some filthy looks,
girl said: “I wish to speak with you.”
me all the figures, seems I’d borrowed sixty books,
fifty-nine of them were overdue!
I made it
home at last and put my key into the door,
turn, I tried to use some force,
work – and then I saw court papers on the floor,
my wife had
won possession, and divorce!
I ended up
in jail, of course, I tried a life of crime,
I hit that
bank just like an Al Capone,
luck, the vaults were empty, not a measly dime,
was on temporary loan!
borrowed all my life and left repayments up to fate,
and now I’m
old and feeling rather sick,
but if my
days are over and I see St. Peter’s gate
I’ll ask him
for another year on tick!
more of my
FUNNY POEMS here